What Your Mother Never Told You - Finally A Book Written For Our Daughters  
What Your Mother Never Told You - Finally A Book Written About Our DaughtersBook About Protecting TeensBook About Protecting TeensRichard DudumRichard DudumRichard DudumRichard DudumRichard Dudum

Testimonials

The following testimonials are on Amazon.com and/or the Internet:

The Washington Post
Use empathy to combat teenage insincerity

In response to a letter from a parent, acclaimed columnist Marguerite Kelly ended her advice column as follows:

You might also give your daughter -- and her middle school library -- a fine book of straightforward, straight-arrow fatherly advice called "What Your Mother Never Told You" by Richard M. Dudum (Island Publishing; $15). It's written specifically for teenagers; it tells them how to behave -- and why -- and how to avoid trouble and how to get out of it. Most important of all, it repeatedly tells them that they are the only ones who can decide if they should lie or cheat; hang out with mean girls or be a mean girl; or drink or use drugs or have sex. Or not.

Your daughter will be making all of those decisions in the next 10 years, but she will make wiser ones if she takes responsibility for them now.

Marguerite Kelly is a freelance writer. Questions? Send them to advice@margueritekelly.com or to Box 15310, Washington, D.C. 20003.

- Marguerite Kelly
The Washington Post
October 23, 2009

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What your mother would want you to know

Every girl has questions she would never dream of asking her mother about.

From boys to parties, from dealing with difficult parents to stereotyping, from drinking to sex, What Your Mother Never Told You by Rickard M. Dudum gives straightforward, blunt answers to teenage girls' biggest, most pressing questions.

Divided into short chapters and well-organized by topic and subtopic, the book is easy to navigate and read. The language it is written with, however, is very frank and slightly offensive.

Dudum apologizes in the prologue for his use of curse words and other offensive words, saying he has not watered down the importance of his message by attempting to be politically correct.

Still, the consistent use of curse words is daunting and would probably not sit well with many girls' mothers.

Reading around the offensive language, the messages that Dudum delivers are vital for teenage girls to know.

The advice it gives is realistic — it advises girls on how to stay in control while drinking, instead of refusing to acknowledge that many teenagers do drink.

And while the book thoroughly addresses the issues of drugs, drinking, sex and relationships, Dudum also writes about how to deal with difficult friends, parents and situations.

He tells girls to be careful on sites such as Facebook and MySpace. There is even a chapter titled Listen Closely and Don't Be Impressed By a Title.

It is a useful lesson for many girls, who are often easily influenced by and submit to older, seemingly-wiser persons, such as a religious leader, coach, police officer, doctor or teacher.

The most unusual aspect of this self-help book is the way the author includes guys' opinions and impressions of the girls he tries to help.

He claims to have interviewed hundreds of teenage boys about their opinions of girls, from what they think of girls' clothing choices to how much they respect hard-partiers.

The result is a valuable collection of what guys really think about girls – things not even a mother would know.

Copyright © 2009, South Florida Sun-Sentinel

- Connie Deng
Marjorie Stoneman Douglas
December 3, 2009

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Hot Moms Club - Holiday Reading Choice 2009
Teenage Girls Survival Guide

Every year, my book club members and I struggle with the all important “holiday book selection”. What is it that we would like to read while on vacations with our families, hosting out of town guests or simply navigating our way around this ultra-chaotic time of year? Our time as busy moms is already very limited, so November and December brings us even less time to enjoy a good book.

http://www.hotmomsclub.com/?p=2992

http://www.hotmomsclub.com/?cat=27

http://www.hotmomsclub.com/?p=4798

Hot Moms Club
- Michelle Fryer
Between The Covers – Holiday Reading Choice
December 2009

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A Powerful Read That Touches The Heart And Mind Of Young Women

Teen girls today face situations that their parents couldn't even anticipate, let alone warn them about. Richard M. Dudum has worked with teens for twenty-eight years, and he knows what's really going on. What Your Mother Never Told You shares his observations with girls, so they can survive this turbulent time in their lives.

Teen girls need to recognize just how special they are. Several chapters focus on the importance of maintaining a good reputation and always putting your best foot forward. A girl needs to honor and respect herself so she can make sure she doesn't put herself in positions where her reputation will suffer.

Next the issues of sex, drugs and alcohol are covered, but not by using a lecture. Dudum doesn't condemn or condone their use. Instead he guides girls to "trust their stomach." He doesn't tell them not to drink, though he does strongly encourage them to avoid alcohol. Instead he advises them on how to handle drinking - to never get so drunk that they don't know what's happening around them.

He talks straight on sex, explaining how boys manipulate girls just to get into their pants. And he tells them how to know when to tell a boy that he's full of you-know-what. No girl owes a boy anything - no matter what he's said or given them.

This is a true survival guide, since many girls find themselves in very grave danger, through careless decisions or in places they have no business being. Dudum provides statistics and stories on girls who ended up either dead or sexually molested, as a reminder that there are consequences to every action.

Although it saddened me to see what teen girls face every day, this book was a wake-up call that I think girls can relate to. Dudum talks straight, in no-nonsense terms, as an adult figure they can trust. I believe this brilliant and well-written book can help girls to stay true to themselves, and avoid destructive behavior that will mar their reputations or possibly end their lives.

- Cheryl C. Malandrinos
Western, Mass
June 25, 2008

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What Your Mother Never Told You: a Survival Guide for Teenage Girls - Richard M. Dudum

Our teenagers today are facing more pressure, more trials than ever before, and author Richard M. Dudum wants to give our daughters a clear, unmistakable message: you don't have to conform to anyone else's idea of what you should be. You can decide for yourself if you're going to get involved in drugs, if you're going to have sex, if you're going to play into the social games. He does this in his new book, "What Your Mother Never Told You," and he does it in down-to-earth language that can't be misinterpreted.

http://media.families.com/blog/what-your-mother-never-told-you-a-survival-guide-for-teenage-girls-richard-m-dudum

- Tristi Pinkston
Families.com
April 3, 2008

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A High School Senior's Review of What Your Mother Never Told You

"What Your Mother Never Told You: A Survival Guide for Teenage Girls" purports to suggest useful tools and strategies to empower teenage girls to be responsible for their decisions and actions. To see if the book lives up to the promise, we assigned three members of the Express-News Teen Team to read and review it.

The new teen self-help book "What Your Mother Never Told You" has some parents raising their eyebrows over the taboo subjects discussed in the book, things like drug and alcohol abuse.

However, parents and teenagers should not judge this book by its cover because though he may be blunt in some cases, author Richard Dudum carries a strong message that could benefit all teenage girls.

In the day and age of self-help books, it is often hard to separate the wheat from the chaff. However, Dudum's book is definitely one that should be kept and considered. Though some may object to his sometimes seemingly over-the-top language, such as in the title of one of the chapters "'You're Special' That's (expletive)!" Dudum states that this usage is simply for emphasis.

Others may object to the content covered in the book, such as the discussions about drug use, how to drink alcohol or sex and what it means for teens. But Dudum says that by writing about these topics, he is looking out for girls' well-being. After all, if mothers or other adults do not discuss with you how you should handle yourself, who will?

"What Your Mother Never Told You" features 228 pages broken up into 11 sections with specific chapters in each. The first section teaches girls about "Perceptions and Communication Skills" and other useful lessons, all the way to the last section, "Hang in There and Go for It," which discusses, among other topics, how to deal with graduating boyfriends, how to find love and how to still have fun while being responsible.

In the sections are chapters covering a wide variety of specific subjects, from "You Don't Owe Him Jack" to "Respect Yourself." Throughout, Dudum attempts to give teenage girls the information they need as easily and rationally as possible.

Reading the book, I was at first skeptical. My mother has bought me teenage self-help books before, and most of them I tossed away because they have no real, meaningful message.

However, Dudum's book immediately caught my attention as I read how to communicate; how to find out what kind of person I am; how to handle myself in public, on the Internet and with the media; how to better my relationship with my parents; how to face life's and my own actions' consequences; how to face all kinds of relationships; and how to deal with the sexual pressure put on girls regularly.

The two sections, however, that truly stood out were "Manipulative Boys" and "Sex, Alcohol, and Drugs." The first section, which features two chapters, one titled "You Don't Owe Him Jack," shows how boys perceive and manipulate girls to get what they want.

After talking with several of my classmates, I saw the need that every girl be aware of how she is being treated and persuaded.

The second section is not simply a sermon on the terrors of drugs, sex and alcohol; Dudum provides extensive evidence to back up all his points. It was refreshing to see the facts, not the lecture.

Some girls are not taught these lessons by adult figures. For those who are not, and even for those who are, this book is a powerful tool for helping teenage girls of all ages grow and mature.

- Korri Kezar, Senior
March 10, 2008

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I wish this book was around when I was a teenager!

Teen girls today face situations that their parents couldn't even anticipate, let alone warn them about. Richard M. Dudum has worked with teens for twenty-eight years, and he knows what's really going on. What Your Mother Never Told You shares his observations with girls, so they can survive this turbulent time in their lives.

Teen girls need to recognize just how special they are. Several chapters focus on the importance of maintaining a good reputation and always putting your best foot forward. A girl needs to honor and respect herself so she can make sure she doesn't put herself in positions where her reputation will suffer.

Next the issues of sex, drugs and alcohol are covered, but not by using a lecture. Dudum doesn't condemn or condone their use. Instead he guides girls to "trust their stomach." He doesn't tell them not to drink, though he does strongly encourage them to avoid alcohol. Instead he advises them on how to handle drinking - to never get so drunk that they don't know what's happening around them.

He talks straight on sex, explaining how boys manipulate girls just to get into their pants. And he tells them how to know when to tell a boy that he's full of you-know-what. No girl owes a boy anything - no matter what he's said or given them.

This is a true survival guide, since many girls find themselves in very grave danger, through careless decisions or in places they have no business being. Dudum provides statistics and stories on girls who ended up either dead or sexually molested, as a reminder that there are consequences to every action.

Although it saddened me to see what teen girls face every day, this book was a wake-up call that I think girls can relate to. Dudum talks straight, in no-nonsense terms, as an adult figure they can trust. I believe this brilliant and well-written book can help girls to stay true to themselves, and avoid destructive behavior that will mar their reputations or possibly end their lives.

- Alice Berger
March 7, 2008

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Providing her with the tools she needs.

Ah, the teenaged daughter. They are a wonder. I have my own and feel qualified to say this. I want to be everything I can for her, but we all know that this isn't possible. Providing her with the tools she needs for life is important. For this reason, I am ever grateful to Richard M. Dudum for authoring "What You Mother Never Told You." I could have used this book when I was a teen and I still appreciated the reminder of certain passages. Get a copy for the teenaged girls in your life, or get one for yourself if you fit that demographic. You'll be glad you did.

Your mother might have sat you down for "the talk" and you cringed, and she cringed. Likely it wasn't enough to answer all of your questions but maybe you couldn't stand it anymore. Maybe you were lucky enough to have a really open mom who you could talk to about anything, but I'll bet there were still a few things that didn't get covered. "What Your Mother Never Told You" covers everything. Yes, everything...from how you are perceived in high school - as a snob, slut, show off, or shy girl - to how you will be remembered at your twentieth reunion, from accepting compliments and gifts from a guy to what you should not feel obligated to give him in return, from telling your parents that you are embarrassed by their behavior, or even appalled by it, and everything in between. What should you do if a friend seems to have an eating disorder, or you think that you might? What can do for a friend who is cutting herself? How can you be supportive of a friend whose parents are getting divorced? What if you need that support?

Discovering who you are and who you aren't is part of being a teen (and an adult!) and this book can help sort things out. It's like having this really cool parent to guide you, but not tell you what to do. Robert offers his advice and readers are free to take it or leave it, but reading it is the way to make informed decisions. Information is an important tool to have, and the best possible tool any parent can hope to give their daughters.

Written in a no-nonsense, straight talk manner, "What Your Mother Never Told You" is right on target with today's teen. Each topic is covered succinctly and with care. In between are pretty images of floral designs, speaking to the femininity of its readers. Used as a tool for parents to broach topics with reluctant-to-talk teens or as a guide for them to read on their own, this book is sure to touch lives, inform minds, and even make you smile as you read about how "you don't owe him Jack..." It is "the talk" on subjects that might make you blush, but are the must have tools for today's society. Bravo!

- Heather Froeschl
Callaway, Virginia
March 4, 2008

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What your mother didn't know.

It IS a different world out there from the one today's mothers and grandmothers grew up in. Girls today are more liberated and independent, but their increased independence, mobility and access to media and the Internet make them more vulnerable to dangers and predators -- at a time when their immaturity and inexperience mean they are not fully equipped to deal with the dangers and temptations.

From a mother's perspective this book is a must-read. It gives valuable insights into the world your daughters (and sons) inhabit, and invaluable tools to helping them handle that world in a responsible way. The language is frank but, frankly, not as nearly as "colorful" as some reviews suggest.

From a daughter's perspective, I wish a book like this had been available when I was a teenager. it would have helped me immensely deal with some of the challenges of growing up, and I believe it also would have made it easier for me to communicate with my mother.

Thanks, Richard, for a really worthwhile read.

- J. Patteson
Orlando, Florida
February 26, 2008

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Insightful & Written for Teenage Girls

Adolescence for those who can remember, is a difficult time of life, and having worked with young adults for some time now, as a secondary school teacher, more often, it is the teenage girls who have the toughest time. This is not to say that boys have it easier, simply girls mature faster, and the decisions they have to make are never easy. Dudum has written something that is quite unique. His prose is directly written for his intended audience, teenage girls, and he pulls it off beautifully.

Dudum's advice is simple and, as the title states, is a "Survival Guide" for teenage girls.

As the cliche goes, "hormones are in hyperdrive"; it is a time when decisions, big decisions have to be made. "Should I follow my friends and have sex though I don't want to?" "What is sexual assault, harrasment and rape?" Who am I, really?" One of the main issues I've come across is self esteem; some young women, although they FEEL it's wrong, that is to say, having sex because her friends are all doing it and drinking, too...will go along (to be accepted) and after the deed is done, plunge into depression, leading to the worst thing you can imagine.

Dudum has covered alot of poignant and relevant issues concerning teenage girls, and in some cases, has hit the nail right on the head.

The most important chapters in my humble opinion are: 9,"Find out Who you really are...Not"; 41, "The Media Hype"; 43, "Manipulative Boys" and, 57, "Hang in there and Go for It."

From my experience, you can never order a teenage girl, "Read this because you need it!" She'll simply will not because you ordered her to; keep it around and she'll eventually, because it's her "choice", pick it up and read it.

And, to be sure, the book is written in such a way that it will at least get her thinking, reflecting about her life...and making (hopefully) the right decisions...and that in itself is a great thing.

- C. Middleton
Australia
February 19, 2008

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As the parent of a teenage girl, reading this book caused me to review all my assumptions about my influence on her life

As the father of a teenage daughter, I read this book with great interest. When I worked through the pages of advice written to the teenage girl, I never really had a thought that I had not raised these issues with my daughter.

My thoughts were always along the lines of whether I have been forceful enough in making my points about what to do and what not to do. She has her own lawn care business that I oversee, so we are working together side-by-side for hours a day during the summer. We talk a lot and she is constantly praised by the customers for how hard she works and that she does it without complaint. However, while the subject of peer pressure has come up many times, I had never looked at it with the intensity that it is dealt with here.

After reading this book, I spent a great deal of time thinking about the various dangers she will encounter and how she, and I, will handle them. My conclusions were that I have done most of what I could to prepare her for these dangers, but the fact that reading this book caused me to question my assumptions was a very positive thing. Teenagers of both genders are very vulnerable but they must be given the freedom to make mistakes that could negatively alter their entire life. This book will help both parents and teenage girls make the decisions that could lead to avoiding those mistakes.

- Charles Ashbacher
Marion, Iowa
January 18, 2008

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A sensitive, smart way to deal with a sensitive time of life

Teenage girls have always been under lots of pressure. But perhaps they are under more pressure today than ever before. That's partly due to the Internet. This book cuts right to the real issues that affect young girls. It touches them where the hurt is.

Dudum deals with these issues among others: how to always have a game plan, how to drink at a party, how to get up and leave before it's too late, how to deal with hateful girls and protect yourself from boys who would take advantage of them, how to handle the Internet, how to anticipate and avoid the wrong place and wrong time, how to tell your parents, and how to avoid the consequences of dressing and acting like a 'ho'.

The book gives tools that young girls can understand and act upon immediately. Finally, the book is useful for parents too. I highly recommended. it.

- Susanna Hutcheson
Scientific Copywriting
Midwest U.S.A.
http://www.powerwriting.com
January 17, 2008

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What Your Mother Never Told You. A Teenage Girls Survival Guide

This book is direct and to the point, there is no beating around the bush. It's written in a conversational style and in language that teenage girls use and understand. Every girl should read this book to know how to protect herself and to hold on to her integrity. This book helps girls make better decision early on and allows them to avoid the negative consequences of making wrong choices. It's difficult getting this information from your parents, it's easier reading the book.

- Eva
January 15, 2008

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A Must Read for Young Adults and Their Parents

Rick Dudum has written a book that addresses many of the tough issues facing young girls today. His advice to them on how to deal with these issues is delivered in a straight-forward, very down-to-earth way. Every parent with a daughter needs to read this book so they can be aware of what is going on in a teenage girls world today. Every teenage girl should read this book to find ways to overcome and deal with the challenges that they are faced with. And every teenage boy should read this book and then "pass it along to a girl that he cares about..." as Rick told my own son. "What Your Mother Never Told You" is a must read for everyone.

- Anne M. Ferrel
January 04, 2008

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A Survival Guide for ALL Women

Richard Dudum's book is an honest and straight-forward conversation every parent/guardian/teacher/friend should have with a woman. No matter what age, every woman deserves to learn the truth about issues involving self-esteem, dating, sex, and love. Working in education for more than six years now, I have spoken with many girls from diverse backgrounds who are misinformed or uniformed about how to treat themselves and how to handle relationships. I have given many one on one talks in hopes that I can help educate these girls, but I realized that I too have a few things to learn. After reading Dudum's book I find it easier to guide students, friends, and myself. What Your Mother Never Told You should be required reading for every woman.

- Sawson Zarour
December 28, 2007

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What Your Mother Never Told You

Loved the book. Very insightful. I passed it along to my 16 year old daughter and recommended that her friends read it too. Thank you for writing such an important book and giving young girls some wonderful suggestions on how to maintain their dignity and enjoy some of the best years of their lives.

- M. Coyne
December 19, 2007

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FINALLY! An Honest Book About Teenager's Life Pressures and Letting Them Know It's OK to Talk To You

I'm really glad there's a book out there like this one for teenage girls AND boys. Growing up, I didn't have a reference book to tell me what's right or wrong, I pretty much heard it from friends (as you know, not a good reference to learn by). At age 12, I remember a close friend asking me if I knew what a period was and my response was "isn't that at the end of a sentence?" and her response was "you may want to talk to your mom". Of course, I was embarrassed and you know what, my mom NEVER brought it up to me OR communicated to me on what life experiences I may have as a teenage girl. SO with that in mind, to have a book out there that will help me communicate to my children as well as something for them to reference when it comes to life's pressures, is very much needed especially in this day and age. Thank you, Richard Dudum for inspiring communication between parents and their children!

- Andrey G. George
December 11, 2007

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Empowerment and Self-Respect

This book offers teenage girls courage, compassion, and strategies for dealing with life in today's complex and difficult world. Richard Dudum addresses directly a wide range of issues, providing specific tools for the specific challenges teenage girls face today. His message throughout is one of empowerment and self-respect.

My thoughts were always along the lines of whether I have been forceful enough in making my points about what to do and what not to do. She has her own lawn care business that I oversee, so we are working together side-by-side for hours a day during the summer. We talk a lot and she is constantly praised by the customers for how hard she works and that she does it without complaint. However, while the subject of peer pressure has come up many times, I had never looked at it with the intensity that it is dealt with here.

- Jeannine Kay
December 7, 2007

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Press Coverage

Richard Dudum's Words Of Tough Love Make A Difference
February 2009

January 2008 Radio Interview
WSRADIO.COM Radio Interview, San Diego, CA
January 11, 2008

Author of New Teen Book Offers Advice
San Francisco, CA (PRWEB)
May 1, 2008


Buy on Amazon

What Your Mother Never Told You uses contemporary teenage terminology with clever memorable phrases, tools, and strategies to empower teenagers to be responsible for their decisions and actions. Now on Sale on Amazon.

What Your Mother Never Told You: A Survival Guide for Teenage Girls by Richard M. Dudum

What Your Mother Never Told You uses contemporary teenage terminology with clever memorable phrases, tools, and strategies to empower teenagers to be responsible for their decisions and actions.

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